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Is the relationship between you and your daughter driving you crazy?

Almost a different language? Don't know if she is too young for a cell for or not? And what about that constant obsession of checking social media?

Well I have found your solution.

It is often said that parenting is the hardest thing to learn, so what do you do when instructions aren't included?

A celebrated psychologist and author Rosalind Wiseman has those much wanted instructions.

Author of multiple books, Queen Bees and Wannabes is perhaps her most known one. Throughout it she breaks down the reasoning for teenage mentality and behavior in a very simple way for everyone to follow.

It starts off by breaking down how the brain develops during those years. Did you know that the brain goes through three stages of development and is not quite "mature" until about twenty years old?

This part of the brain is known as the limbic system and it is responsible for emotions and decision making. 

The process starts during early puberty and the teen becomes more emotional.

The second stage happens around 16 years of age and by this time decision making, planning ahead and choice making develop.

The third and last stage happens around 20 years old and it is in this stage that the teen will have more control of emotions and stress. 

So remember: It's your teen's brain and not your teen that is driving you crazy. 

Now teens always get the cliché that they are labeled under some sort of clique.

Society believes that he or she must belong to either the jocks, art kids, cheerleaders, or even the bitter-sweet academic club.

Although this cliché does, according to this book, hold a truth behind it, it is also true that parents can be labeled as well.

The parental clique is determined by their parenting ways and strategies. Some of them are:

• "Lock-Her-In-A-Closet-Parent"
• "Best Friend Parent"
• "Believer Parent"
• "You mess with my kid, you mess with me Parent"
• "No Excuses Parent"
• "Gently Neglecting Parent"
• "Champion Parent"

So before you read the book, what kind of parent do you think you are?

The book has had so much success that Tina Fey made a movie based on it in 2004, entitled Mean Girls.

Believe me, you daughter has seen this movie at some point in her life due to its immense popularity. Ever noticed her wearing pink on Wednesdays or wearing animal ears on Halloween? Voilà your answer!

Your teen may even be able to relate more to the movie due to the fact that it takes place in Evanston, Illinois. Throughout the movie "North Shore" keeps being mentioned over and over and one of the scenes even takes place at Old Orchard Mall in Skokie. For those who have watched this movie before and get my reference, yes it looks like Gretchen did make "fetch" happen. 

Here are some more resources to explore further:

Masterminds & Wingmen

By Rosalind Wiseman

Rosalind Wiseman does a great job as she takes you through an odyssey into the boy's mindset. This book mirrors Queen Bees and Wannabes in every way but focuses on boys' behavior and how to deal with their everyday problems. It's written in second-hand writing and makes you feel as if she is talking directly to you. 

Little Girls Can Be Mean

By: Michelle Anthony

This book is, in my opinion, the best book to read right when your daughter is a toddler. According to many experts, girls in today's society are facing bulllying and the concept of a "social life" as early as early elementary grades. Things from gossping, idea of beauty, and what is cool and what is not is introduced duirng these years so it is best to kill the problem from the root right as they develop. It is basically a Jr version of Queen Bees and Wannabes.

Age of Opportunity

By: Laurence Steinberg

This book is great for those who want scientific explanations for behavior and knowing how the brain works. It talks about the limbic system that I discussed about earlier. It is also one of Wiseman's reference books for some of her studies. 

Mean Girls

Okay, so I know this isn't a book, but I'm sure you can watch it as your take a break from all that reading. For those who have watched it before, watch it once again. We all know that the limit for watching this movie does not exist. (Another movie reference thrown in there for you!)